Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

The sadness was still there.

Be who you already are.

What CIA front organizations operated in the United States during the 1960s?

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

And the sadness?

What is the cost of living in Sweden as a family?

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

You are like me, then.

My parents force me (15yo atheist) to go to church, and there’s this thing called Small Sundays where we discuss the Bible in groups, there are questions asked about the Bible. What am I supposed to do when they ask?

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

I was tired of fighting.

Have you ever secretly watched someone while they were doing something private?

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

It’s here now, writing to you.

I had run out of hope.

How can I decorate my house creatively?

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

What factors contributed to The Beatles' bitterness?

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

Have you ever been physically attacked by a demon?

It’s still here.

I was tired of trying and failing.

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

Why cant I sleep even tho I am sleepy? I am not anxious or worried but my body just doesn't want to. I've been awake for almost 2 days and feel sleepy but I cant sleep. My doctor said its anxiety related but its not. Is this normal?

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

Why do you think Democrat favorability ratings are so low?

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.